Anytime I’m bored in public, I like to people-watch and imagine what passersby would be as dogs. Dogs are basically people anyway, just in a furrier, more lovable form. They have distinct personalities, strengths, quirks, appearances, likes and dislikes. Are you imagining what breed your best friend would be? Your hairdresser? Your boss? I’ve imagined some for you: male celebs’ alter egos, dog point o.
Bulldog. Their bone structure and jawline are surprisingly similar. Everyone likes them – loves them, really – but they don’t seem to win a ton of awards. But when they do, you know it’s gonna be a great speech. (photo above)
Husky. You can’t help falling for those baby blues. I imagine they both check themselves out in the mirror when no one is looking. Huskies are also known to be pretty vocal dogs, and I definitely wouldn’t be mad if Zefron dog called me.
Caucasian Mountain Dog. They were once bred to hunt bears, but now are just extremely large and muscular. Sounds like The Rock to me. Plus, WWE fighting is basically the same as fighting a bear, and I would feel comfortable putting bets on Mr. Johnson versus a grizzly.
Shiba Inu. Both are hard to train and have independent natures. Shiba Inus are also pretty invested in their appearance, and are actually cat-like in that they are often seen licking their paws and coat to keep clean. Justin has yet to reveal what hair product he uses, so we can only guess…
Golden Retriever. Just a great family dog; everyone wants one. It’s the eyes, too. Soft around the edges, but also perpetually sad looking. But also really, really good looking.
German Shepherd. Tall, dark and handsome, both are top-tier in their respective professions. And really, if a German Shepherd could talk, it would totally have Denzel’s voice. My man.
Coonhound. A good ol’ farm dog is the perfect alter ego for a good ol’ country boy. Imagine this for the next Lincoln commercial: a hound riding shotgun alongside McConaughey as he softly speaks nonsensical things with a dreamy southern drawl. Man and man’s best friend both peer into the desert distance as thunder rolls in the background, lightning cracking through the sky. This is Lincoln….You’ve heard it here first, folks.
Let’s be honest. He’d be a cat. Probably feral.